New Year City Style (1.1.11)

      New Year's morning; One of my favorite moments of my day is the experience of twilight sleep, the moment before I am fully awake and yet am still actively imagining and dreaming snuggled in my cozy and warm bed.  In this morning's twilight, I was thinking of the life that I have built for myself in NYC.  Four years ago, I remember when I moved into the city with only knowing less than a handful of people that lived in the city.  At a New Year's Party last night, I was talking to a woman who moved to the city only four months ago.  It stirred in me the feelings of being a NYC newbie--when I went home to Long Island every weekend because I did not know anyone in the city.  So many memories-- I remember going into Barnes & Noble and having coffee to see if I could spark a conversation and begin a new friendship.  I remember my good friend Chad saying to me "Your life is here in the city now.  You need to stay in the city, and build your life here now."  I took his advice, and began to stay more in the city, and less in Long Island.  

     Four years later, I reflect upon the life that I built for myself in the city.  I embarked upon the unknown, and have created a life that I love in the city.  I am grateful for Jim--my friend, my love, and my partner-- and the life that we have begun to create together in this city of life, love, sensation, and struggle.  I think of all my friends, my long-time friends from St. Ignatius, CAP, St. Anthony's, and Loyola who are always present in my heart even when we can not be in person together.  I reflect on the love, support, and zaniness of my family that have instilled in me a zest for life.  I think of all the friends that I have met here in the city, who have become so special to me in these last four years.  In New York City, I waited on tables for two years to pay for graduate school and in the process met my best friends to explore this city.

     On New Year's Eve night, I struggled my way up the stairs to a rooftop to toast to the New Year in my four inch gold heels.  As I looked at the Empire State Building with the wind whipping at my hair, I thought to myself "Wow.  I am right where I always wanted to be."  And, then I began to think of the people who built this city--Did they ever think of the people who would come in 80 years later to build their lives in the city that they built?  Even as my thoughts slowed from the one too many sips of champagne from the night's festivities, I realized that I have a lot to learn about building.  When we build, how much do we take with us from the old buildings of our lives? (I speak a lot in metaphor) Are we supposed to build our new lives fresh from the moment we arrived? Can our lives from our past fit in with the new lives that we built? These are questions that we face when we leave our home, and go out into the world to carve out and make our own.  

    So, what did I do? What any NYC gal would do. I let the questions pass for a moment, let myself take in the beauty of where I was at that moment, and stole a New Year's Kiss from my future hubby on top of a building rooftop in New York City.